There is so much going on that I just haven’t been able to find the words to write. I know that I need to write more since it does help, it’s just been hard.
My daughter cut up her arms… again last night, by taking the blade from a pencil sharpener. She has a lot going on, however most of it sadly is her own fault. She had a boyfriend, who broke up with her, got back with her then dumped her again. She is now in the process of figuring out whether she wants to get back together with him. He apparently makes her happy. I told her to do whatever she wants, since she’s going to anyway. It doesn’t matter what I say or do, she is in her own selfish world. She has stopped opening up to me, but it’s ok because she opens up to this boy. Well, what exactly is this boy going to do to help her? Happy Mothers Day to me I guess. I’m at a loss of what to do, she has to find a better outlet then cutting, yet every suggestion I give her gets ignored.
I understand cutting, I used to cut and there are still times that I want to. Sadly cutting is not considered a Mental Health issue, therefore taking her to the hospital is pointless. They don’t have the means to deal with it here anyway she would be sent up to Hamilton, and then there is no way for me to see her. Even the last time she went to the hospital they didn’t do anything but change her meds. When we went to the walk in clinic to get a refill I asked for an increase, since she’s still on the lowest dose. Apparently because she has only been on it for a month, it’s too early….. that’s a first for me to hear that.
I am in the middle of finding a new doctor for us. So that puts a damper on things a bit.
As for me, I have a boyfriend, well an ex boyfriend that we got back together. It’s going well. He wants to be over more then I want him to be, only because I guess he’s finding out that having your own place isn’t as much fun as he thought lol. He’s bored a lot and likes being here since something is always going on here.
I’m so done with everything.