Swearing involved..

So last night was a shit storm, the health care system in this area for adults sucks ass, for teens it’s basically non- existent. I took my daughter to the hospital at about 5pm and got home out at 4am in the morning.

A friend of mine was nice enough to bring my daughter Wendy’s at about 1am and kept asking me if I wanted anything. So he ended up bringing her real food instead of the hospital bag supper that was nasty. He then stayed until and drove me home.

So what happened at the hospital.. After triage, they got her into the back room where they beginning process of the psychiatric process begins. Within the hour I got booted out of the room so that my daughter could talk to the ER doctor.  I went outside for a smoke, when I got back the doctor had just left and apparently asked my daughter if I was planning on taking her home. She of course she said no. Within the hour the psychiatric nurse kicked my out of the room again and sat and walked with my daughter for about 30 mins. When she was done she came into the hall and talked to me, she told me that my daughter was really smart and knew her stuff. She had the basic grasp of the family history for mental health, as well as the meds that she was on.

So we were told that it shouldn’t be long for the psychiatric doc to see her. All this was done before about 8pm. At 12:30am the psychiatric doctor finally got to my daughter, he took us into this tiny office to talk to her.  She was open about everything and showed him her cuts, he then asked me right in front of her family history, stuff that she didn’t know all of. It seemed he was more curious about it then anything,  he was ready to send her home. I had to fight with him, because I told him that she could not guarantee her safety. She already told me that if we went home there was no way that she could say with 100% certainty that she would be safe.

So I told the doctor that, he looked at her and asked if she was able to contract her safety at home.. She had no idea what he was talking about so I had to ask it in English. She said no, so he seemed almost pissed, he said he would be right back with her paperwork. When he came back he made a point of showing her all the pages that he had to fill out to get her admitted, seriously?? That is your biggest concern, fucking idiot.

So finally a security guard came down and we just had to wait for the porter to take her upstairs. When we finally got to her room, the guard sat outside of her room and the nurse started asking my daughter some questions, just general ones. She asked me if I was staying the night, I said no and my daughter wasn’t too happy about that. It’s not that I didn’t want to be with her, it’s that 1. I hate hospitals, 2. I didn’t have my meds and 3. I need her to stop using me for a crutch so much. She needs to learn to find coping skills that work for her.

I feel really bad leaving her there, seeing as how there will be a guard outside her door, she is NOT allowed to leave her room and I haven’t gone yet to see her. I know what it’s like to be alone in the hospital and it sucks ass. I’m her mom I’m supposed to support her and it’s not like she is in a place where there are kids her age going through the same thing. There was another guard outside the door next to her room, which means she’s not the only teen on that floor that is there for psych, but unlike MacMaster there are no programs or support to help her learn new skills or coping mechanisms.. nothing.

So she has her books, her journals and that’s about it. They didn’t even check her bag, last time in January she wasn’t allowed to have some of the stuff that she brought (pencil a spiral notebook) in her room at all, they went through every inch of that bag and even took out the sweat pants because they had a string. This time nothing, it’s almost like they don’t care. I want my daughter to get help not feel fucking isolated.

Fucking stupid ass health care system… new hospital and no psych ward for teen. You have to be 17 to go to the psych ward here, otherwise you get shipped off to another city.

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