The way life works out sometimes

So since Sunday my daughter has been in a much better mood, yet at the same time driving me crazy. Since we broke up she seems to think that she can get whatever she wants, even though I keep telling her that there is still trust that needs to be earned back on her part, for past issues. She expects to get data and internet on her phone (which she has), plus a later bedtime (which was extended 30 mins) but that wasn’t good enough. She wants an even later bedtime, plus her ipad, plus to be able to keep her phone in her room at bedtime.

The problem with all that is that she is known for staying up all night on her electronics and looking up things that are not appropriate for her to be watching. Yes, I get it, she’s 14 and with all the free flow of information on the net there is a bunch of porn that kids will watch. Add to the fact that she’s curious about sex and her body etc. It’s more WHAT she was looking at, not the fact that she was looking at stuff.

So while I’m glad she’s happy, she still needs to earn that trust back. I have been with this type of stuff since she was 9, and every time I trust her again she breaks it. So, while she needs the chance that she will follow the rules, she needs to stop showing me that she can’t.

Me, I’m dealing. Being alone sucks, I mean yes, I have my daughter who is now glued to my side, it’s the physical touching of the opposite sex that I miss. The hugs and the kisses, that kind of thing. Though at the same time I’m glad I found out what happened before it was too late.

We saw the doctor the other day and he knows that we broke up, he asked why and I told him the basics. I also told him that I didn’t contact the police, because of the fact that they won’t do anything. The whole he said she said thing. On the walk to the doctor I told my daughter that if on Tuesday she is still feeling guilty or anything to talk to her counsellor.  He is no longer a threat to her since I kicked him out of the house, so there isn’t much more that anyone can do. I made sure to emphasise the fact that if she does feel like she needs to talk about it, just make sure the counsellor knows that he’s out of the house.

She has a fear that him and I will get back together. I told her that it wasn’t going to happen. If after what she told me, I kicked him out, why would I get back together with him? She didn’t really have an answer for that, more of just how she felt. So I reassured her that I understood how she felt, but we are never getting back together. If he said it, if he didn’t, I’m not willing to take that chance.

As for him and I, we have been civil. His cell is still under my name for now since his credit sucks and I said it was fine, as long as he paid for it.  Plus his POS truck is still in the driveway, so ya. Once the truck is gone I don’t have to see him, and he can even pay his part of the bill online without even talking or texting me. Thankfully I am in control of the data, which I can turn off and on for each phone and I can suspend his number if he chooses to leave me with the bill. Hence why I’m ok with keeping it under my name. If he misses more then next months payment then he loses the phone and can get it hooked up under his name.

Other then that life goes on as usual, though I have to cut back on how much I’m cooking for dinner. At least the food bill will be cheaper, which is good since my limited budget sucks.

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